My Weekend

     This weekend I had a fabulous time.  I went to the movie theatre on Friday with a group of friends (all woman; one of which was my niece Kendle) and we saw “Think Like A Man” by Steve Harvey.  It was fabulous.  I laughed so hard through out the whole damn movie and I can relate most of that laughter to Kevin Hart.  He completely stole the show.   If you have some free time and want a good laugh please go and see this movie.  It is so worth your time. 

     Earlier that day I went shopping and found some fabulous shoes.  I am such a shoe whore.  I will probable be buried with a few pairs of sexy shoes; just in case.  Laughing my ass off, right now!  Sounds crazy but I am so serious. 

     Saturday evening around three,  I went to the Bay Front Park where I sat my chair down by the Mobile Bay and attempted to read my book by Syd Fields.  I love being in places where I can just relax and enjoy the scenery.  I’m just sitting by the water and the wind is blowing so hard that I could not enjoy myself.  Now that morning I decided to curl my hair instead of wearing my wig and my hair is blowing all over the place.  I started out with ahead full of curls but ended up with a flat mess.  Then of course there was the threat of rain.  I said, “the hell with it” and grabbed my stuff and went home.  I was so disappointed because I really wanted to enjoy a relaxed day by the water.  Didn’t work out that way but always another day.

     Saturday night, I ended up watching a few old movies and a few forensic files.  I find the investigative channel so appealing.  I probable watch it every day.  I don’t know what it is about it but I find it very hard to turn the channel.

    Sunday, I went to church with my daughter and we had a wonderful time.  Service was great.  Came back home and took a nap.  Yes, a nap.  God, I’m getting old.  Then at four something that evening I get an invite from my niece, Kendle,  to come to Gulf Shores and have drinks.  Mind you that Gulf Shores is a little over a hour drive away.  I get up out the bed and just go.  I did manage to take some changing clothes just in case.  You never know what might happen.  So I get there and find out that everyone is waiting on me before they go to dinner.  I didn’t even know that I was going to dinner.  Wait a minute!  Did I mention that my niece’s new boyfriend, whom I’ve never met,  is there.  I’m completely not dressed for dinner but remember those changing clothes.  Hey, a girl has to prepare, so I run straight to the bathroom to change.  Did I mention that I also brought my wig.  Ha! Ha! Ha!  Am I not fabulous.  So ten minutes later I’m like ready for the party.  We go to this fabulous restaurant and for a walk on the wharf, then drinks. 

     We ended the night at his condo where we played cards and danced.  I tried really hard to teach him and Callie how to do the wobble.  It was so not working but so funny to watch.  Poor, Callie.  Really!  All that ass and you can’t wobble.  I have to admit that I had a wonderful time.  I still haven’t convinced them to go parasailing with me.  It’s a work in progress…

PJ

I have hope

     Two days ago I realized that I wasn’t in pain.  A crazy analysis to make but you have to realize that I’ve been in constant pain for well over fifteen years.   I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia and arthritis.  This illness has really been hard for me to deal with.  I have to watch how I lay my arms and my legs, the way I sleep, and the way people touch me.  I use to love getting a deep tissue massage but I can't take the pain of having one.  I also have problems with sleeping and the past week I’ve been sleeping like a baby.  I've been praying for this day for a very long time; to go to sleep and wake up rested.  You don't realize how important that is until you don't have it.

     If you have fibromyalgia then you know that the pain is constant and you feel pain all over.  This illness has affected my whole life and the way I look at that life.  Up to now I’ve had to arrange my life around my condition.  It’s hard to plan any thing because I never know how my day is going to go.  If I will get enough sleep at night, if I’ll go to sleep at all, will the meds work, is the pain going to be worst, will I have enough energy to go and do things, and how will I feel after I’ve done them.  It’s been a battle that I’ve had to fight over and over again.  It's very discouraging when you have dreams and you think you will never be able to fulfill those dreams because of some thing that you have no control over.

     I can’t believe that I’m not in pain and for the first time in a long time I feel like going to do things; hang out at the beach, go for a walk, and go shopping.  I contribute this to some over the counter drugs (mainly herbs and vitamins) that my doctor recommended.  He told me that it would take a few weeks for the medicine to take affect.  I had no real expectations.  I’ve tried so many pain pills and they all have the same result; minimize the pain but never take it completely away until now.  I feel amazing.  My energy is coming back and I’m starting to feel like my old self again.  I can’t tell you how wonderful this is because I feel like I can do the things I’ve dreamed of doing.  I have hope.  Wow!  I’m trying not to get too excited just in case things don’t work out.  I’ve had medicines that work for a little while but have side affects or they stop working as good over time.  I can’t help but to feel like maybe I can get back to doing the things I’ve dreamed of doing for some time now.  Feels like my world is opening back up again.  Thank God!

We all have trials

     No matter what your going through always remember that you are not the only one.  Life is a never ending circle and we are always going through something or another.  It doesn't matter how much money you have, your job title, or your status in life; because guess what, when it's your time to go through something you will go through it.  These are our trials and tribulations; they build our character.  I think that when you know who you are on an intimate level, it's easier to know what to do when your in a storm.  Because you know how much love and care you require.   When I think of trials and tribulations I think of them as storms.
    When you're in a storm be patient and try to figure out the reason. Nothing in life happens without cause.  Everything that happens in our lives has purpose and it is up to us to figure out what that purpose is.  If you don't discover this purpose you may be set to repeat this storm over and over again.
     In the meantime give yourself a lot of love, be as patient and understanding as you can be towards yourself, and allow yourself to just be.  Feel what you need to feel and get through it.  Please don't deny your feelings an outlet because they will come back to you in other ways; nightmares, anger, physical pain, sleepless nights, rage, and anxiety.  Trust me when I say, "you don't want that."
     Learn to honor your feelings and if it helps learn to communicate those feelings to someone that you trust.  The safest way to go is to write them down in a journal, then keep your journal in the trunk of your car.  I've found it very helpful to express my trials through a play because I can be any character I'd like and there's a lot of work through.  The key here is that you have to find what works for you.   Just remember that we all go through trials and tribulations, but it's how we deal with them that defines who we really are.
PJ